is there any good way to play tf2?

im not a huge fan of playing the random tf2 gamemodes like deathrun and all that
casual is not casual and gives me anxiety
any community servers i find no-ones really interacting and having fun and all everyone seems to want to do is kill kill kill
i also like to vc with people but no-one is really down for that
i live in the uk so i cant really play usa servers
i also dont hugely like servers like dispensor's fun server where its just everyone is friendly all the time
i havent played tf2 in months and really i want to play it, but i cant find any good way to actually play the game
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heya cutie
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